Into the Room: Making a Space for Teletherapy
With the public health concerns around Covid-19, many therapists are moving to online therapy sessions. While it is fortunate that clients and therapists are able to continue to work together in this incredibly stressful time, I think it’s important to acknowledge that teletherapy is not quite the same as meeting in person. In your therapist’s office, they (hopefully) have made an effort to create a safe space for you to work together. As much as possible, most therapists aim for their office to be relatively calm, quiet, and comfortable.** With teletherapy, however, part of the responsibility for creating a good therapy space falls on the client. I wanted to offer a few tips for clients who want to have a great teletherapy session. Check them out below.
Choose a location that is private and free from distractions. I beg of you, please don’t try to have a therapy session while driving, or participating in a work call with yourself on mute, or chasing a toddler. All clients are juggling different responsibilities, and creating a secure set-up can be a challenge, but it’s important to remember that therapy is not simply an exchange of information. Therapy is a process. Your therapist should (ideally) serve as a secure base as you explore new ways of being in the world, as you identify what matters to you and what you need, as you heal in and from relationships, and as you navigate past and current suffering. As much as possible, you want to set aside a space that allows you to be fully engaged in the session.
Check your lighting and internet connection. I will confess…I made this blog post almost entirely because I couldn’t find a link to a resource that mentioned the importance of the therapist being able to see the client. And friends, it’s really tough to do good therapy when we can’t see you. Please make sure that both your lighting source and your internet connection allow your therapist to see you clearly. I know it can be uncomfortable for some folks to think about seeing themselves on the screen, but for therapists to do our jobs effectively, we need all the ‘data’ we can get, and that data includes your face.
Check your position. Trust me, an hour is longer than you think it is. Try to find a position where you’ll be comfortable over the course of session. You may have to experiment with different set-ups that allow you to be relatively relaxed and still seen by the camera. It’s helpful to try different options before your appointment.
If you are being seen as a couple or family, it’s important that you be in the same location. Not only are there additional logistical and ethical concerns around clients being in multiple locations, if you’re being seen as a couple or a family, good therapy is about developing the connection between you. The work is about fostering emotionally healing experiences for each family member. This is a bit trickier to do that when you’re in separate locations.
Because Covid-19 has moved so much of our lives online, I think it can be easy to end up treating a teletherapy session the way you would yet another conference call. Instead, it’s helpful to think of it as an opportunity for growth. All places for growth (gardens, nests, dens) share similar qualities: protected, cultivated, tucked away, so that something powerful and wondrous can happen inside.
Erica Turner, LMFT
**I know someone is going to email me to say, what about walk and talk therapy or therapeutic wilderness campus, or really active play therapy, and yes those are also important! But not the focus here, lol.